Familiar and yet.......
I haven't been hiking in months but on Monday I laced up my shoes, put in my earbud (yes, only one because I like to hear all the sounds around me) and stepped out onto the trail. It's a trail that I have traveled over and over in the past 6 years.
I know the twist and turns.
I know the nuances of the elevation.
I know where the mile markers are without looking down at the app on my phone.
I know how long the hike takes (even when I am hiking at my slowest).
I know where the rocks are and which ones are steady enough to plant my feet upon.
I know where the ground is going to be soft from holding water from the latest rain.
The path is familiar. The path is known.
And yet, in the midst of the familiarity, it was hard. My feet had not traveled the path in more months than I can count. My muscles felt tight. My breathing a bit harder as the elevation climbed and then dropped. It was familiar and yet so different. The last time I attempted to hike this trail was last fall and on Monday it was filled with sweet smells that I had not encountered for some time. Shades of green that had burst of color swept across the landscape. In the midst of this familiar path I struggled and wavered just a bit. I felt the unfamiliar roll over me while taking in the beauty of resurrected flowers and ferns that were created for such a time and season as this.
As I planted one foot in front of the other I could not help but think about the trail/path that my heart and soul are walking through each day. As the sun rises, I awake to the reality that I am walking the path leaving one congregation and being accepted by another one.
The path is familiar. The path is known.
I know the stress of sorting, pitching and packing every single item in a house.
I know the expected sadness that comes from walking the 'lasts'.
I know the expected grief that rolls over you when you least expect it.
I know the balance of letting go and while wanting to hold on just a bit longer.
I know the joy and excitement of a new beginning.
This is a path that I am familiar with and yet it has been 6 years since I last stood upon this path. It is familiar and yet my breathing has become a bit more labored as the tears and grief roll over me in the moments I least expect. The handing over and releasing the people you have tended to and cared for and been loved by and tended by is like navigating the elevation of the terrain, it literally leaves you breathless. This road is familiar and yet difficult to traverse.
The familiar is turning to the unfamiliar. No longer will I know the twist and turns, soon I have the privilege of planting my feet on a new trail called East End UMC. A trail that will no be filled with 'lasts' but will be filled with 'firsts'. There is a sweetness in rediscovering the fullness of who God has created you to be and living into that in a new setting {scary and a bit overwhelming but nonetheless sweet}. I know that the unfamiliar will bring new waterfalls of grace, new burst of laughter and connection and an abundance of love that is filled with a deep and abiding river of joy.
I am walking in the familiar and yet the unfamiliar. I am walking the trail of grief and letting go while catching glimpses of what the new trail my hold for not just me but the three of us known as the Diamond clan. I am letting the tears of that which is familiar fall while slowly opening my eyes to the powerful, holy and breathtaking trail that lies before me.
Familiar and yet ....
I know the twist and turns.
I know the nuances of the elevation.
I know where the mile markers are without looking down at the app on my phone.
I know how long the hike takes (even when I am hiking at my slowest).
I know where the rocks are and which ones are steady enough to plant my feet upon.
I know where the ground is going to be soft from holding water from the latest rain.
The path is familiar. The path is known.
And yet, in the midst of the familiarity, it was hard. My feet had not traveled the path in more months than I can count. My muscles felt tight. My breathing a bit harder as the elevation climbed and then dropped. It was familiar and yet so different. The last time I attempted to hike this trail was last fall and on Monday it was filled with sweet smells that I had not encountered for some time. Shades of green that had burst of color swept across the landscape. In the midst of this familiar path I struggled and wavered just a bit. I felt the unfamiliar roll over me while taking in the beauty of resurrected flowers and ferns that were created for such a time and season as this.
As I planted one foot in front of the other I could not help but think about the trail/path that my heart and soul are walking through each day. As the sun rises, I awake to the reality that I am walking the path leaving one congregation and being accepted by another one.
The path is familiar. The path is known.
I know the stress of sorting, pitching and packing every single item in a house.
I know the expected sadness that comes from walking the 'lasts'.
I know the expected grief that rolls over you when you least expect it.
I know the balance of letting go and while wanting to hold on just a bit longer.
I know the joy and excitement of a new beginning.
This is a path that I am familiar with and yet it has been 6 years since I last stood upon this path. It is familiar and yet my breathing has become a bit more labored as the tears and grief roll over me in the moments I least expect. The handing over and releasing the people you have tended to and cared for and been loved by and tended by is like navigating the elevation of the terrain, it literally leaves you breathless. This road is familiar and yet difficult to traverse.
The familiar is turning to the unfamiliar. No longer will I know the twist and turns, soon I have the privilege of planting my feet on a new trail called East End UMC. A trail that will no be filled with 'lasts' but will be filled with 'firsts'. There is a sweetness in rediscovering the fullness of who God has created you to be and living into that in a new setting {scary and a bit overwhelming but nonetheless sweet}. I know that the unfamiliar will bring new waterfalls of grace, new burst of laughter and connection and an abundance of love that is filled with a deep and abiding river of joy.
I am walking in the familiar and yet the unfamiliar. I am walking the trail of grief and letting go while catching glimpses of what the new trail my hold for not just me but the three of us known as the Diamond clan. I am letting the tears of that which is familiar fall while slowly opening my eyes to the powerful, holy and breathtaking trail that lies before me.
Familiar and yet ....
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